Live each day as if your life has just begun

Wow, this is my last blog post for this class.  This semester has FLOWN by, like honestly where did it go I feel like I missed everything, and I didn't appreciate every moment left with my friends who are graduating.  Even though the semester is over and I am sad about everyone graduating I am so excited for this summer!  My sister is graduating high school, my awesome summer job will be starting again, and my family is going on a CRUISE!  In June my family will be going on a cruise and I am beyond excited for it.  I have heard mixed reviews about cruises, most people I talk to have loved it, but a few people I have talked to who have been on a cruise have talked about how they were stuck on the boat, and they did not really enjoy it.  I know now though, not matter what I WILL enjoy every moment on that cruise.  I missed moments with my friends this semester I am going to make it a point to enjoy and appreciate every moment I have with my family before I graduate next year, and my sister goes off to college.  Big changes are happening this year, but I am thankful for the huge celebrating my parents have created for my siblings and I.  I will cherish every moment with them, and I will make the best of everyday for the rest of this semester, my cruise, and the whole summer.

It takes courage to grow up and become who you really are

As the semester comes to an end I am forced to face graduation and the fact that the majority of my friends will be leaving me.  All through college I have had two or more groups of friends and the majority of those friends are graduating this year, I will honestly have 5 of my close friends left next semester.  This is terrifying because now I have to go back to how it was freshman year and try to meet new friends and new people, because if I do not I will definitely be bored or lonely.  I am very sad that graduation is just around the corner, but I also am so thankful for the people this school has brought into my life.  My best girlfriends are graduating, the person I always went to to vent and cry and complain is leaving, my best friends from high school is graduating, my two girls that over the past year have also become my best friends are graduating, and my boyfriend is graduating. 

It is such a big step for them and I am so proud of them that I can not even explain, but I am sad, because I know I will see them maybe a few times a year.  I have had amazing times with all of these people and I know I am going to miss them incredibly next year.  I also need to keep in mind that these people who mean so much to me will also be facing a lot of changes (changes that are much larger than mine) they have to go out now and create a life for themselves with what they have learned in college.  I am so proud to call these people some of my best friends, and I can not wait to see what they become in the future and where we will all be 10 years down the road.

Happiness happens when we learn to expect nothing but appreciate everything

This is my Grandmother and Grandfather
on their wedding day.

Last week was a week of excitement and sadness all mixed together.  On Thursday I had to skip two classes and work to go home for my grandfather's burial.  He had passed away on January 18th, 2012 and considering it was January and the ground was completely frozen we were unable to bury him after the funeral.  I was speaking to my boss about me having to miss work because of this and after a while of talking she said she had never thought about that, considering everyone she has lost in her life has been in the spring fall or summer, and they were always able to bury them after the funeral.  She expressed her condolences for my loss and mentioned how hard it must be to have to deal with the loss on two separate occasions.  Yes, she is correct it is difficult to have to deal with it once in January and then again a few months after, and I was anxious about it to say the least.

At the burial, when I thought it would be extremely painful and sad, I was surprised as to how much easier it was to deal with the loss.  It is amazing how much four months can do in the healing process.  In January whenever anyone said Beepa (which is what everyone in my family called my grandfather) or mentioned a memory with him, someone in my family would start crying.  As I have mentioned before I have a rather large, close family, so it doesn't take much to get everyone crying when someone else is.  Along with crying though, there is laughter, when one person starts laughing, everyone starts laughing, and that is how the burial was surprisingly easy.  It isn't hard to think of the times with Beepa that are hilarious and that is what my family focused on during the burial ceremony.  The actual ceremony was solemn and touching, but when the minister asked my family to sing a verse of amazing grace, we all couldn't help but chuckle.  My family is not musical to say the least and my grandfather always found it amusing when we tried to be musical, so singing at the burial ceremony was a perfect way to lighten the mood.

After the formal ceremony, we all went to my grandmother's house to have food and celebrate my grandfathers life and be together as a family.  At my grandmother's house my cousin who is 26 announced that his girlfriend, Katie, would be having a baby boy.  We have known she is pregnant for a while but they were keeping the sex of the baby secret.  They decided though that when they decided on the name Nolin, that the get together after my grandfather's burial would be a perfect time to announce the sex.  My grandfathers name was Olin Kenneth Johnson Junior, and naming the newest baby to enter our family after him is, in my opinion, one of the best ways to honor him.  So after a ceremony that turned into a celebration, and an announcement that honors my grandfather, I would say the day that I thought could be really sad, turned into a day that was full of laughter and tears of happiness.  I can never express how much I miss my grandfather, but I have learned over the past few months, that my Beepa who was always laughing and always cracking horribly bad jokes, would not want us crying over him, he wants us to appreciate the life we have now and be happy the way he always has.

Life begins at the end of your comfort zone

As the semester begins to come to a close, I keep getting more and more excited for June.  In June, not only does my awesome summer job start, my sister graduates from high school, and my family is all on summer vacation, but I am going on a CRUISE!  The cruise is 10 days long and we are going from Florida to Mexico and Belize.  I have never been out of the country, not even to Canada, and I am extremely excited.  My whole family is going, which I talked about in my first blog, so there will be a lot of people on the trip, and I expect it to be the best time ever.  It has been one of my dreams to travel the world and starting with a cruise I think may be my most ideal way to start.

My mother and stepdad surprised my siblings and I on christmas day, after they have already gotten us everything we had asked for.  We all screamed and were jumping around like those children that you see on TV when their parents tell them they are going to Disney or something.  We were all so excited and my younger sister and I still to this day can not stop talking about the cruise and what we are going to do on it.  I am a little nervous though because as I have said I have never been out of the country, and I have never been on a cruise.  Going to a different country for the first time will be a little strange for me, I am sure, but I am so extremely excited to be out of what is normal for me and forced into a place that I know nothing, or very little about.  I can't wait to go and I am sure I will make a million memories with my family that will last forever, but no matter what I am always anxious about the unknown.

Life is too short to wake up with regrets

This past week, when the weather was beautiful and you couldn't help but want to spend all of your time outside, I connected with some of my friends that I haven't seen much this year.  I made it a point this past week to spend as much time with my friends I haven't seen much as I could.  I used to spend all of my time over at Washburn with my friends, but since classes have gotten demanding and graduation is looming of many of their heads, it has been hard to connect.  Last week we grilled, played whiffle ball, played frisbee, got ice cream from the ice cream truck, and just sat and talked outside.  I remembered how easy it is to get into a routine, and spend all of my time at my boyfriends house, with his roommates and my friends, that I forget there is a whole group of people that I spent the past three years with that also want to spend time with me.

 I have made it a point to spend time with all of my friends, no matter what group they are in, I need to make time for my friends and for myself, and hope the group I am not hanging out with will understand.  I have to understand that graduation is coming and a lot of my friends will be leaving and I most likely will see them at best once or twice a year.  This fact that I have been putting the back of my mind, pretending like it wont happen has come into focus this past week, and I need to make sure I spend time with ALL of my friends.  I do not want to regret not spending time with my friends when they are all graduated and not around anymore.  It is imperative that I spend my time with people that I have loved for the past four years, and that I will miss more than anything next year.  Last week was amazing but I have to make a point to make these next weeks up until graduation amazing as well.

Because when you stop and look around this life is pretty amazing

As the weather gets warmer I am forced to realize how much I love this place I call home.  Living here in Orono/Old Town for the past four years has obviously had its ups and downs.  I find as the weather has improved so have the moods of myself and the people I am surrounded by.  This weekend has been one of the best weekends of the semester, not only because it was St. Patty's Day weekend, but because everyone I came in contact with had a smile on their face and were generally in a good mood.  At Hannaford all of the customers were in a good mood, smiling, and enjoying their day.  That right there makes my life at work worlds better.

The weather directly effects my life and the lives of most of the people in Maine, which made me realize that I need to take the time to walk outside and enjoy every minute of everyday.  Since the weather has improved my mood has improved, which has made me think I need to find something good in everyday, no matter the weather.  I have made a goal for the rest of the semester and the year that I take a minute or so each day and write down a few things that made my day good.  This way I am not dwelling on all of the bad moments of the day and even if the weather isn't forcing me to be in a good mood I need to find something in my life to make every day a good day.  As of right now my list would include how mice it smells outside, and gentleman at Hannaford who put a smile on my face complimenting me, and the fact that while I am writing this all of the windows in my apartment are open and the breeze is blowing in.  I found I need to realize even the smallest things that can make my day that much better.

Live for the moments other people don't notice

As spring break comes closer here at UMaine, and I am stuck up here the whole time working, I start remembering my past spring breaks.  Though I have not gone any where tropical or warm I have a had a few good spring breaks.  My favorite by far was Freshman year.



My best friend Molly is from Worcester, Mass and she and I were inseparable, so needless to say we spent spring break together.  It started with us renting a hotel room in Bangor so we could stay here and watch the UMaine vs. UNH hockey game, which was great.  We are huge hockey fans, and watching them beat our rival school was awesome.  We then road tripped 5 hours south to Worcester where we stayed for a few days with her family.  Her family is amazing and have become a huge part of my life and getting to know them for those few days was so much fun.  We met our boyfriends in Boston and ate and shopped for the whole day.  The weather was perfect and the atmosphere in Boston is amazing.  After we had spent the majority of our money we all went back to Molly's house and had a little barbecue even though there was still snow on the ground.


After a few more days at Molly's house my boyfriend and I drove back to Maine where we stopped for one night at my house in Gorham, and then continued on our way to Camden where my boyfriend lived.  Camden is a beautiful town and we just drove around and looked at all of the beautiful houses and beaches.  I met my boyfriends family for the first time, and met all of his friends from home.  We went to a house party at his friend from high school's house, where I felt out of place, but still had a great time regardless.  The following day his parents, who are Greek, made a dinner that I at first was terrified of.  The main dish was lamb.  I had never eaten lamb and never thought I would, but in fear of being rude I tried it anyway, to my surprise I loved it.  It was great eating and laughing with his parents and brother, but sadly after dinner I had to head out on my way back home.  I spent the remainder of my spring break with my family, which was relaxing and nice, but I seriously missed my friends.

Spring break always comes at the perfect time, and even though I haven't gone anywhere special I have spent it with some of my favorite people in the world.  I have learned that it does not matter where you are it really only matters who you are with.  My friends and I can have the best time doing absolutely nothing, which really comes in handy up here in boring old Orono.